Anyone have any advice for what to say in a letter where I acknowledge that I haven't been "listening" to him and I validate the way he feels? I need to let him know that I understand now that he doesn't feel "heard" and I want to listen. I also want him to know that I understand that this is what's lead to our hostile interactions and the arguing, because we both feel defensive. I need him to open up the lines of communication, and feel comfortable talking to me. Because right now he's just closing off more and more and detaching.
I'm also really weak. He called right before the kids went to bed and sounded all down. I texted him "smile.

you sounded down." and he didn't respond. Then I texted again later asking if he saw a news story. I need something to pop up on my phone telling me not to send a message, because I can't control myself! Aaaaahhhh! I also tried to call but he didn't answer. Texted back that he was in the shower. I've gone 2 days without any relationship talk, but I wish I knew where he stood and what he's thinking. I hate this separation business.