Trenton

In your scenario a few questions would come to mind, do you always override your own internal struggles to meet the needs of your wife's internal struggles? Is this because providing comfort and guidance to your wife reinforces your feelings of self worth (Alpha ego) and so you'd rather focus on helping her than you would moan about your day in competition against hers?

It very well might be that women, being more emotional creatures by default, have a greater need to have their internal struggles met with understanding, non judgmental guidance and support; whereas, men have a greater need to feel as if they are successfully the provider of this comfort and support and in providing this actually feel better themselves and their internal emotional struggles (Don't mind the long run on sentence).

In other words, both internal and external struggles exist for both but the way these struggles become settled for men and women is very different.

So my general question for you would be, in helping your wife did your own bad day seem less bad? -or- did a part of you resent that you had to speak about her day rather than yours?

The other question would be, do you have an example where your internal emotional struggles superseded that of your wife and how did your wife respond to this?