| | Re: He kissed another woman...
I have been checking and there is no evidence of any further contact between them. There are a couple of things I don't know atm: if he has worked "there" again since Monday (I think he said he wasn't on Tuesday but I don't know about yesterday or today), and his battered old phone he takes to work, if he may have used that to contact her. There was nothing to show he had when I checked on Tuesday, my understanding is that he only had her number in his new phone and I deleted it from there, couldn't see it saved in his old phone.
I can only assume she wrote her number down and gave it him, so I have no idea what has happened to that.
It's little things like this that spring to mind and bother me. I also saw the website we used to look at engagement rings in the browser history and I felt so angry that he was talking about getting me a ring whilst lusting after her. I just keep wondering, what was he thinking? How much has he messed things up by "only" kissing her? I keep wondering how he went from basically begging my forgiveness on Sunday right after he told me to two days later wanting to leave? I wonder if he was contemplating if I threw him out, what it would be like, and he wanted to "get in there" first... It is obvious he hated not being in control of the situation and I wonder if this came about because of that, he wanted to have some power, maybe his wish to leave wasn't as strong as he made out and it was a considered reaction to regain some control? I don't know.
The other thing that is bothering me... One of the first things I said about how he could make me feel better was to call me from work... He hasn't done that ALL WEEK... I know he gets busy but he's not so busy that he can't call my parents, or sent texts (a couple on Tuesday, in response to me texting him about some money stuff.)
However in other ways he is trying... I have noticed little touches, like when he got in yesterday and my parents were here, walking past me in the kitchen, touched my hip and mouthed, "you ok?" He responds to my touches when we're snuggled up in bed, a hand over my hand, holding my hand, stuff like that. I would like more but I think my mistake in the past has been to almost dismiss little things like that because he hasn't gone the whole hog. I am noticing them and appreciating them, which is why I am reluctant to ask for more right now- I don't want to belittle the efforts he is making. I am thinking rather lots of positive reinforcement when he DOES do stuff might be the way to go?