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StrongEnough · 12-02-2008, 02:51 PM

This thread baffles me!

How in the world can you deal with this? I don't know what I would do in this position, but I do know that you are giving her WAY to much credit here. She is NOT, I repeat NOT, responsible for your happiness. Only you can dictate your happiness. She should not have this massive amount of power to have her cake and eat it too. I worry that you think so very little of yourself that you feel you need to put up with this. You fear standing up for yourself because you are afraid you will lose her. How about standing up for your marriage and your family? Your children? She needs help, but so do you. You are codependent on her and will allow her to do whatever she wants as long as she doesn't leave you! That's terrible. Eventually you will grow to resent and even hate her for what you are going through if this path continues.

I would suggest talking to your pastor, a counselor, perhaps her parents, anyone that can help end this self destructive behavior.

From what I see this isn't an open relationship or even a marriage. It's her getting everything she wants and then some and you enabling it.

12-02-2008, 02:51 PM	#14 (permalink)
StrongEnough Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 472	Re: the open marriage delima This thread baffles me! How in the world can you deal with this? I don't know what I would do in this position, but I do know that you are giving her WAY to much credit here. She is NOT, I repeat NOT, responsible for your happiness. Only you can dictate your happiness. She should not have this massive amount of power to have her cake and eat it too. I worry that you think so very little of yourself that you feel you need to put up with this. You fear standing up for yourself because you are afraid you will lose her. How about standing up for your marriage and your family? Your children? She needs help, but so do you. You are codependent on her and will allow her to do whatever she wants as long as she doesn't leave you! That's terrible. Eventually you will grow to resent and even hate her for what you are going through if this path continues. I would suggest talking to your pastor, a counselor, perhaps her parents, anyone that can help end this self destructive behavior. From what I see this isn't an open relationship or even a marriage. It's her getting everything she wants and then some and you enabling it.