it-guy

I'm ok with what jnj express said....no harm taken. I can see it as ones strong opinion towards leaving the marriage. It’s only natural for us all to have strong feelings one way or another based on our personal reasons for posting on this site.

Yes, I have chosen to stay in the marriage. I do love and adore my wife. She's my friend, we get along, we can work together (wedding photography on the side of all things...lol), and she turns me on. We had mind blowing sex last night....just spontaneous and not planned. And, great kids that I want to raise stable and happy.

For all these reasons she was able to hurt me like no other person in this world can hurt me. And I'm just waiting for this pain to go away somehow. It just does not seem fair that to keep what you want the most...the woman, family, and life that you had, you have to endure so much hurt. It uproots you. It knocks the foundation right out from under everything in your entire life. I feel like I've had a brain tumor removed and now I have to learn some of life’s most basic functions all over again.

Yes, this is a big ol pity party. Sorry about that. After all this was partially my fault. She is not a mean person and, she was not thinking about hurting me when she did this. She was just going after some happiness in a very bad way. I guess part of this is about venting.

I do appreciate the comments by everyone on here. I'm going to keep walking around with a smile on my face. We've talked about this. She knows that I'm putting this smile on my face as an effort to get us out of the mud. We are just trying to live life well and let some dag on time pass. And I hope I'm like many other people on this forum in a couple years. I want to look back on this and say, wow, it sure did get better with time.