we have been married for 4 1/2 years and now i am considering strongly calling it quits ... but i really do not want to, or do i???? i honestly don't know.
i spent the last year away from wife due to being at an isolated duty area (active duty navy ... and can't wait to get out btw). four months into the tour, i could feel my wife starting to drift away and she eventually stopped communicating with me, despite my efforts to stay in touch. needless to say we became disconnected. upon my return, my wife told me, among other things, that she no longer wants to be intimate with me, and does not want any affection with me at all (holding hands, kissing, hugging, etc.). she also does not want me sleeping in the same bed ... i have been relegated to the guest bedroom and using the guest bathroom. before i left last year, our sex life was non-existent, and when we did have sex it was short lived.
i have expressed to her several times that i am not happy with this living situation and i cannot and will not continue to be in a marriage like this. i am not happy with the current situation and i do not know what i should do. i have already packed up my things and set them aside in the garage, and i am ready to move out.
my dilemma is that i am not the type person to just quit something, especially relationships, never have, and i take my wedding vows very seriously, but when does a person call it quits? i know marital problems come in different scenarios, but honestly, at what point does a person move on? how do i know this behavior is not the normal behavior for military deployments?
i spent the last year away from wife due to being at an isolated duty area (active duty navy ... and can't wait to get out btw). four months into the tour, i could feel my wife starting to drift away and she eventually stopped communicating with me, despite my efforts to stay in touch. needless to say we became disconnected. upon my return, my wife told me, among other things, that she no longer wants to be intimate with me, and does not want any affection with me at all (holding hands, kissing, hugging, etc.). she also does not want me sleeping in the same bed ... i have been relegated to the guest bedroom and using the guest bathroom. before i left last year, our sex life was non-existent, and when we did have sex it was short lived.
i have expressed to her several times that i am not happy with this living situation and i cannot and will not continue to be in a marriage like this. i am not happy with the current situation and i do not know what i should do. i have already packed up my things and set them aside in the garage, and i am ready to move out.
my dilemma is that i am not the type person to just quit something, especially relationships, never have, and i take my wedding vows very seriously, but when does a person call it quits? i know marital problems come in different scenarios, but honestly, at what point does a person move on? how do i know this behavior is not the normal behavior for military deployments?