| | Re: Divorce after only 10 months? (Long)
This is only salvageable if you are committed to getting to know each other, instead of rescuing. Generally, the realities of marriage are too much for a whirlwind courtship. You may want to look at codependency resources. Do you normally choose men that are needy in some way?
Before you married, this was a very dysfunctional situation and for some reason, you did not walk away when you saw all the blood red flags. Your husband was emotionally burnt out from all the problems and needed another woman to quickly comfort him; he married his rebound. Why are you living next to his ex if she causes drama? Why do you need that?
The first year of marriage is hard enough; newlyweds have to manage their expectations and learn to be a happy couple. You also have blended family issues. I feel so sad for you.
Have a serious talk with your husband about the division of labour. Ask what went wrong in his first marriage and also what his hopes are for his second marriage.