Originally Posted by s0medude
Sorry for not responding in a couple days. I went to our old marriage counselor today, by myself, and divulged all that has recently transpired in my life. She informed me that I need to back off and give my W space, which is what my W has been asking for all along. I will give her space. I was told that a month would be feasible, and that after that month is over my W needs to give me a definitive answer whether to fix the marriage or get a divorce. I still don't know if I have the balls to pump an ultimatum like that one onto my wife, but we both know it's not fair to keep me in limbo like this.
I also learned that my wife loves me but isn't "in love" with me, something I've read a lot on this board. She still says "I love you" to me, gives me hugs and kisses when we're coming/going, but she says she lost that passion for me that she once had.
Will giving her space really work? My counselor says it's been known to work, she just couldn't guarantee it (which makes sense).
This is how it goes. Normal evolution of things. Why woman often go after another male to fullfill her. You have to keep falling in love through out your realtionship. That takes lots of work.
I have been married for a loooonnnnnngggggg time. I can honestly say that over the past two months my relationship has really heated up again and is very passionate. I took the steps to make this happen. I had to work at it to get that fire going again. You cannot just put a marriage in auto-pilot.