| | Re: I feel disrespected and can't move on.
You say you felt blind-sided and I would think he felt the same way when they showed up with the lingerie. He had to make a fast decision at that moment and although he knew you would be upset, he obviously didn't feel that this was so inappropriate that he should cancel the shoot, and he was honest with you about it.
I would appreciate the honesty as he knew you would be upset but put his respect for your honest relationship above keeping himself out of 'hot water'. Since you appear to have different views on art and what is appropriate or not, perhaps this is where you should focus your thoughts and if he plans to stay within your comfort zone going forward he can make some changes (discuss wardrobe up front) to avoid these situations down the road.