Kauaiguy

Addiction to drugs, drinking and or smoking requires a REAL desire and effort to quit the habit. Or it requires something SERIOUS to happen that forces the addict to quit. i.e. Spouse leaving, failing health ...etc.

So far, he hasn't taken ANY responsibilities in regards to placing his family first and the NEED to quit his habit.

If it has gone on this long, IT WILL CONTINUE. I know that's being blunt but deep down, I think you know yourself.

Playing video games is OK as long as he does his share of chores around the house and I think it's only fair that if he is NOT working that he takes the major load of the house chores.

I did this when I retired and the wife was still working and it worked well. LOL! That is until she finally retired herself but continued doing practically nothing around the house. Aaaargh!

But unless something positive happens, I think you'll eventually find the end of your rope.

Like I've said before: If only one is making the effort of trying to resolve a problem, it's not going away ... and the end result is a separation or a divorce.

It has nothing to do with you loving him ... that is a cop out ... He wants you to continue loving and supporting him, while he remains IRRESPONSIBLE!