Talk About Marriage - View Single Post

Snowqueen · 01-11-2008, 05:52 PM

Okay- where to start. This is hard enough since I don't really talk about my problems with anyone but my best friend and family. I've been married for almost 3 years, and I've realized that I'm no longer in love with my husband. I don't think my husband is inlove with me anymore either. We love each other to pieces and care about each other dearly, but we've grown apart due to a number of reasons.

He and I are different in every single way, and we don't have anything in common. It's hard to do stuff together apart from watching movies and having sex. And since the romance part has pretty much died, I have no real to desire to have sex (which hurts both sides and makes us drift farther apart). So what is left is friends who are married to each other. We don't have kids, thank heavens, but I don't know what to do. Part of me wants out of it, and another part wants to make it work, but I'm having trouble finding any motivation.

There's been some emotional abuse which has left scars on me, and I constantly have to try and pull myself out of depression. I try to fix the problem by letting my husband know what I need from him, and he says he'll change, changes for about 24-48 hours, and then reverts right back to the old style. We're going to probably try marriage counseling, and hopefully that will help. But I just wanted to ask other opinions...how can you stay in a marriage if you don't love the person anymore? I sort of want to leave and start anew, but it would kill me to hurt him because I care so much about him. Frustration, depression, and loss of motivation. Any thoughts?

01-11-2008, 05:52 PM	#1 (permalink)
Snowqueen Registered User Join Date: Jan 2008 Posts: 6	I feel so alone and lost Okay- where to start. This is hard enough since I don't really talk about my problems with anyone but my best friend and family. I've been married for almost 3 years, and I've realized that I'm no longer in love with my husband. I don't think my husband is inlove with me anymore either. We love each other to pieces and care about each other dearly, but we've grown apart due to a number of reasons. He and I are different in every single way, and we don't have anything in common. It's hard to do stuff together apart from watching movies and having sex. And since the romance part has pretty much died, I have no real to desire to have sex (which hurts both sides and makes us drift farther apart). So what is left is friends who are married to each other. We don't have kids, thank heavens, but I don't know what to do. Part of me wants out of it, and another part wants to make it work, but I'm having trouble finding any motivation. There's been some emotional abuse which has left scars on me, and I constantly have to try and pull myself out of depression. I try to fix the problem by letting my husband know what I need from him, and he says he'll change, changes for about 24-48 hours, and then reverts right back to the old style. We're going to probably try marriage counseling, and hopefully that will help. But I just wanted to ask other opinions...how can you stay in a marriage if you don't love the person anymore? I sort of want to leave and start anew, but it would kill me to hurt him because I care so much about him. Frustration, depression, and loss of motivation. Any thoughts? Last edited by Snowqueen; 01-11-2008 at 05:58 PM.