Quote:
Originally Posted by greenbaglady
You married her because you made her stop talking to her parents  
She's probably held on to that thru your whole marriage--shes probably thought how could you control her this way. Maybe she's really wanted to be with her parents or talk to them and you wouldn't let her
You should be the one to feel bad.
She shouldn't have to ask for the divorce she shouldn't have married you in the first place...marriage isnt about controlling someone and making them not talk to their parents.
Maybe this would be a good time to make things right and tell her you want to change you encourage her to get in contact with her parents--regardless of whatever happened between you and the parents or her and the parents to block this communication...you need to fix that! YOU.
She's been going around under your control no wonder she feels like shes TRAPPED and unhappy 
I hope you get some professional help....or spiritual help. |
Now, this is just my opinion, but I dont think its fair to lay the blame entirely on him. She is an adult, and while she may be vulnerable and not as independant, she makes her own choices. He may not have forced her to not speak to her parents, and he may not be consciencly controlling her. It might be her choice to let that happen.
I dont know how old you two are, but I feel for you. There are a few similarities in my marriage and yours. I know what you mean about feeling obligated and worrying about their well being, I feel the same, on top of worrying about my own well being as Im not 100% sure I'll be ok.
I would say, at the very least, try, try to love her, or at least be loving towards her. Give yourself a deadline, saying "if you dont feel a certain way about everything, about her, by whatever date, then its time to end it. But you might live with regret knowing that you didnt give it the effort it deserved. Im not saying that you
will miraculously fall in love, you cant force it, but it at least deserves a good effort.
But you both deserve to be happy, so if its not with each other, its time to move on....Easier said than done, I know.