Originally Posted by Enchantment
Have you ever asked her these questions?
Oh yes, I asked. By the time she got my attention, she said it was too late and she no longer had feelings for me. That is the verbal answer, but it is not a satisfying answer to me.
When I first came to the forum, I made the comment that I was puzzled because we just aren't the kind of people who divorce. Some people thought that was naive of me, and apparently it was, but when people go against who they have claimed to be for so long, it's just puzzling.
It may be tough to explain, but divorce just seemed like a huge step for a person with her beliefs and personality to make without giving a 100% to make the marriage work.
If a woman had come to my wife at anytime during the first 17 years of our marriage seeking advice and saying she wanted to divorce her husband for the same reasons my x gave, she would have done everything in her power to convince her not to divorce. Then, my x would have talked to me about how ridiculous the woman was; however, she apparently thinks it's all good now.