| | My husband doesn't want me anymore
Well....where to begin. my husband and I have been married for 4.5 years. In the beginning our sex life was TOP notch and then I got pregnant for my son and he wanted nothing to do with me. i lost all of the weight after i had my son and got back in great shape. I got pregnant for my daughter and the same thing happened. Now i am pregnant for our last baby. i know he isn't into pregnant women but he also isn't into me when I am not pregnant. No matter what I do to attract him. He doesn't even notice me anymore. His typical excuse is i am in a funk but he will look at porn and take care of himself. Now in the past week he was talking to his mother infront of me and he compared his feelings to..."It is like having pizza everyday and occasionally you want a steak" i guess I am pizza. His words cut me so deeply. why did he even marry me!!! Sex isn't just about sex it is about showing your love for each other! He can't even do that.
I know that I am attractive and I have been hit on by other men. He doesn't want me anymore. He also told his mother he doesn't look at me the same way he did when we first met. He isn't affectionate and we are living like roommates. I am starting to feel so alone and deprived. I am a stay at home mom and we have two little ones and one more on the way. i am also running a daycare out of my home.
I want to tell him I want a seperation just so he can go out and get his STEAK but i am going to get mine too. I feel so angry and hurt. He is making me feel unattractive and very undesirerable!!! I feel like I should find someone else just to validate the fact that I am attractive and worth someones time. Whenever we are out in public he is eyeballing everything that walks by. My selfesteem is in the toilette. I feel like I am the ugliest person in the world. The hardest thing for me is he refuses to talk to me about any of this! Not too mention the one person that matters the most doesn't like me. we have had sex two times in the last three months. i am not fat nor am I ugly. Although he makes me feel that way. i am 5'7 and I weigh 136 when i am not pregnant. I work out and I try to take care of myself and our little ones and him.
He swears he is faithful and not talking to anyone else but I really don't believe him anymore. Part of me wants to just crawl into a hole a die. I made a commitment and I want to stick to it but it is so hard when he really doesn't care about me at all anymore. I cry everyday!!!!!! he is causing so much pain. I look at him and I want to scream and hit him. I want him to realize what he has right here infront of him.
Please help I need some advice. i feel like I can't cope anymore.