whattodo0

Well, while our backgrounds and reasons are very different, my situation is very similar. I too am new here and was also looking for advice regarding the same subject. Without getting into all the specifics, I feel very disconnected to my husband, and wonder if I ever really was connected. I was young when I married, not sure of who I was or what I really wanted. But, Im also a pretty dependant person who has made my entire existance about someone else.

Im torn about loving him, and feeling like Im in love with him. There is no passion, no fire whatsoever. Its just like going through the motions. I dont know that Im my best person in this marriage, and we arent very compatible on the surface. But Im so attached, I dont know how'd Id ever let go and not miss him. I, too, have changed, as has he alittle, but....Im torn about what to do and how to recogonize if I should give this up, or if stick it out.

So, I really feel for you. I keep waiting for someone to tell me what to do, and I realize that isnt going to happen, as Im sure it wont with you, either. I guess we just have to dig deep, and figure out if our marriages are benefiting us, or if we are sacraficing too much in order to maintain them.

Do you two get along, or is there alot of arguing? Are you still intimate, or living as room mates, and most importantly, is she aware that you are serious about needing her to understand you more and that youre considering separation?

I doubt this helped you at all, but you are definately not alone.