yogaman

Hi Oreo:

I'm a guy. If a guy masturbates alone while he is married and otherwise the relationship is normal, then I think something else is going on. A guy will take having sex with his wife over masturbation any day if things are going right. You have to understand what's going on inside him. Does he open up and talk? Do you think he's honest with you? I don't think that it is normal for a guy not to initiate sex with his wife - just my opinion though.

I'll tell you what, most guys would kill to have a woman do for them what you are doing for him: sending him sexy notes, dressing up, watching porn, etc - and daily I might note! Most guys I don't think get even close to that sort of attention from their wife. I know I don't and many of the things you do my wife will not even try. So it sounds like you are not the problem.

Let me suggest something that is quite sensitive in nature, but how does he act around you? Is he affectionate when you're not having sex? Is he attentive and appear caring? Does he ever do something for you to show he cares? If not, then that can give you a clue that he has some other deeper problem with you. You have to be honest with yourself about his behaviour toward you.

Also, is your sex drive higher than his, or are you doing these things for him ONLY b/c you think he likes it? Just some things to think about.