08-31-2011, 01:26 PM
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: The South! "Kiss my grits, y'all!"
| | Re: 2 years ago today...
Originally Posted by Almostrecovered
It is end of winter in 1994 (February?) and my parents have been back together for almost year now. There are no signs of my father cheating on her, but I admit at this point I wasn't looking nor caring if he did, I just wanted nothing to do with it. I come home from work and see my parents at the kitchen table looking remorse and they're asking me to sit down as they have something to tell me. I think to myself, "Oh great, here we go again!"
The news was far worse-
My mother was diagnosed with stage 5 colon cancer and it had already spread to her liver, where several inoperable tumors resided. Her chances of living past a year are not good.
I do have to give my father some credit as he really did take care of her that year and made her happy. She passed almost a year from her diagnosis. Fortunately it didn't get really painful or bad until the last 2 weeks of her life. We had her in our living room when finally passed early in the morning after my brother's birthday.
At this point I had patched things up with my father for the most part, especially having witnessed his care taking of my mother. We agreed to start a business together and I ran it while he funded it while he worked at his regular job.
It's November of 1995 and my mother has been dead since February, our business seems to be working and taking off (we're doing it out of the house and we started to look for warehouses in the area). My brother who is a math guy did the accounting on the side while he held his teaching job. He calls me up and tells me he forgot to pay the phone bill and if I could write the check and mail it. I can't find the bill in the bills due folder- I figure it must've been mixed in the house bills. I go downstairs and start looking through my father's bills. For whatever reason, my eye catches a glimpse of a weird charge on his credit card bill. It's from August (when he took a trip to Vegas for business) and the charge was for $72 for "The Chapel of Love".
That's one of those quickie marriage places! My father has been secretly remarried less than 6 months from my mother's death! I start to scour his credit card bills and discover that he had dinner on Valentine's Day 3 days before my mother's death at an Indian restaurant. I know that the total of this bill is definitely a dinner for two. The bastard had dinner with his mistress and now wife while I sat next to her watching her die on Valentine's day. Back in February he had told me he needed a small break that day and went out to dinner- I thought nothing of it at the time and understood needing some time away after spending over a week at her side. Being Valentine's day wasn't even a consideration for me.
I packed my things, found a place to live with a friend and left the business (my brother took over, I became a car salesman of all things). I didn't speak to my father for 3 years. It wasn't until I went to get engaged and wanted my mother's stone for the ring that I spoke to him.
In some ways this was good for me- I finally started to control my bipolar disorder and I learned to support myself. I was just so angry at the lies of my father. Was I disappointed he got married so quickly after her death? yes But it was his life and he couldnt hurt my mother anymore. I just didn't want to be a part of his life for a period of time.
WOW a secret wedding in Vegas? BTW, my Dad has always been a cheater as well, ever since I was a little girl I knew of his mistresses.