Your husband sounds EXACTLY like I was (yes a woman) when My sex drive went through the roof , I seriously CRAVED it 3 times a day. I had some kind of testosterone Boost in my body, the wave lasted a full 8 months. Not sure why but it is all I could think about, I would lay there at night waiting till am to jump on him, and if I didn't get it, I would start feeling he didn't desire me, he is loosing his sex drive, I would play this over in my mind -that he is slowing down- and I wished he was younger again so he could give it to me 3 times a day, I felt we missed the best years of our life. It was not an easy time for me personally. Looking back this is rather amusing -because I even sent him to the Docs to get his Test checked. AT that time, I didn't know men slow down as they age , I was so clueless.
I have calmed down since then. ha ha but I am sooo glad I had this experience. It has opened my eyes to how MEN feel.
The fact your husband wants to be with you so very much over masterbating or looking at porn is a beautiful thing, he loves being close to you, he craves it. I am only leaving this response here -just to give you some idea of how it is--on the other side.
Heck, this MIGHT happen to you when you hit your 40's too! Then you will sit in awe and think "My god, now I get it " I agree, every day can get to be a BIT much if expected. I really do , but please understand --he has a high high sex drive. He is healthy!!!
Just let me say, When I got a taste of the other side of this, I cried many tears thinking "HOW in the He** did my husband put up with this all these years - as he wanted it every day but we only did it once or twice a week). I felt I did him a grave grave injustice. I only wish my husband would have let me KNOW his feelings and needs as YOURS is doing, mine choose to suffer in silence instead. And took it internally. This is no answer either. I was SO angry at him when I learend of this, I felt he denied us both. I cried, I was angry , a gammet of emotions.
Men are sensitive too.
Not sure what the answer is -just to say, when you strart feeling LIKE THAT, it is like a craving that is going to end in a release. Nothing else will fullfill it and masterbating is kinda hollow and empty. If this is his answer , it may lead to some rensentment. His sex drive is likely NOT going to go away, he is still going to crave you every day.
You may be happy to know, as you age, yours is likely to CLIMB some and his will go down slowly, and you & he will be near = in these matters. This explains it :
Quote:
Balance the seesaw. When they were first married, the man remembered, he always took the sexual lead, pulling his wife close and whispering his desire to make love. But now, 20 years later, she often makes the first move.
Again, hormonal changes are bringing the couple into closer balance. Men and women both produce testosterone and estrogen, but the proportion of each changes over the years. The male's shifting levels of estrogen and testosterone may make him more willing to follow than to lead, happy for his wife to set the pace. And as a woman's estrogen declines and her testosterone becomes proportionately greater, she may become more assertive. |
I wish I knew THEN what I KNOW now, in how it felt on the other side. I will say this.... having been both places....It is MUCh easier to be the lower drive spouse who is not feeling it -but go along --over being the HIGHER DRIVEN spouse who is feeling it so strongly and questioning if the love of thier life still wants them, needs them, craves them.
There was nothing I wanted more, for a time, than him to WANT ME more than I wanted him. I felt NEEDY and a BURDEN- even though I worked this up in my mind. And yeah, I would get mad if I felt he didn't want me! This can happen, I beg you to try to
understand him, even though YOU are not feeling it . I am very thankful my husband understood me during that time, but I know what helped him --he lived that for many years himself !
Typically - Women do not understand the male drive.
And it could be he uses SEX as his stress /tension reliever.
Here is a great book on the differences in sex drives, it may help you understand him and yourself better.
Amazon.com: When Your Sex Drives Don't Match: Discover Your Libido Types to Create a Mutually Satisfying Sex Life (9781569242711): Sandra Pertot: Books
This covers 10 libido types - Sensual, Erotic, Compulsive, Dependent, Stressed, Disinterested, Detached, Addictive, Entitled, and Reactive.
Maybe he is a Dependent and Addictive, I don't know. I classified myself as an Erotic Dependent when I was feeling that way.