Re: Transparency
In my opinion, you don't need to ask him if he wants the no contact letter.
Even if he says he doesn't, deep down, it WILL HELP HIM in moving towards trusting you again.
Ensure your no contact letter is short, and to the point. Don't apologize to the OM for ending it.
Write it out on paper, and give it to your husband with a post it that says "please mail this for me". Make sure it isn't sealed in an envelope so he can read it.
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