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Good days, and Bad days...

3K views 3 replies 4 participants last post by  Shoeguy 
#1 ·
We seperated in March (6 months ago) and were divorced in June (3 months ago). I have been in therapy during the whole thing and have had a lot of support at work and from my family. It has been a rollercoaster of emotion. For awhile, there was a stretch of almost 2-3 weeks where I really thought I was over the fact my marriage ended. I was doing great and enjoying being single and devoted to my job. Then I found her twitter page. I didn't even know she had one and only found it because I have had one for over two years and follow a common friend.

Her twitter feed had tons of messages to the guy she cheated on me with. I expected her to be with that guy after we got divorced, but seeing it in black and white really hurt. Since that time, about 4 weeks ago, I have been really feeling down. It feels like I have been cheated on all over again. I am seeing someone now and like spending time with her, but it's not fair to this new person that my mind gets preoccupied with these other thoughts related to my ex.

Our divorce wasn't civil and I don't talk to my ex. I know we will never get back together and eventually she will move onto a new boyfriend and possibly get re-married someday, but the fact that she is with this guy has been hard to handle. He essentially encouraged her to divorce me and I have never met him and don't know him at all. He is the definition of a marriage wrecker.

I know I am better off without her but I just wanted to vent and posting here helps me resist the urge to send her a nasty email or something.
 
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#3 ·
Yesssiireeee Bob!!! I vent here too!!
Look, recognize what those feelings are, and if you still got them, it just means that the marriage you had meant something to you. Its actually a sign of character and integrity in you. I hear these things take time, and I know that the exwife I am still living with has this whole world of a second life with other men that the most I see of is text messages showing up on her phone, and her pulling all nighters. If this OM got with a married woman, and pulled that b.s., you can rest assured that now that hes completed that conquest he will lose interest fast, and on to the next married woman while with your ex. Giving her a full dose of her own medicine.
Definitely come post here. Vent, rave, get mad. Lon and I and many others are going thru the exact same thing here.
 
#4 ·
I agree keep posting. It has helped me tremendously. I have had similar emotions although my ex didn't start seeing a mutual friend until after our divorce. (So she says). Since she is in a relationship with a friend that brings in a whole other wrinkle into the problem. But I'm working through it with freinds, family and group therapy.

Take care and keep venting it really does help I think.

Shoeguy
 
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