Talk About Marriage - View Single Post

Cam2008 · 02-05-2008, 09:57 PM

I am very hesitant about this post so don't be too cruel.
I have been married for 16+ years to a wonderful woman. Have 2 great kids, great job, great house, etc. Everything seems to be just fine. We have very close friends with similar aged kids. I have become very close to one wife in particular. Our feelings have grown as the years go by. A year ago the family moved 7 hours away. I was very distraught over this. It took me a long time to get over the move. Not only did I lose a great guy friend but I lost a very close female friend. Recently we have begun talking more and more. Our feelings have never died I learned even after the move. We have never acted on our feelings in any way. The thought has crossed our minds on more than one occassion. As it turns out we are in love with each other. Or I should say in love with the idea of being with each other. Both families recently vacationed together for 5 days. It was so hard to leave. I have not been the same since. We talk almost daily and all seems to be fine except we are getting closer by every phone call. We have recently told each other that we love each other. We actually think of each other more than we think of our own spouses. We both realize that this is very unhealthy for both marriages and we don't want to do anything to come between our marriages. We realized that if we continue at the present rate, we are both in a lot of trouble down the road. We decided to back off for awhile. No more phone calls. When this happened, I felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest. I am very sad about the whole ordeal even though I know in my heart it's the right thing to do. I have never been emotionally hurt in my life. This is very new to me. I have potentally lost a very dear friend as well as someone I am in love with. I love my wife with all my heart. I always have ever since high school. I do not want to leave her. That's not even an option I am willing to think about. I adore my kids they are great. I could not stand to be apart from them. I realize that I am terrible for falling in love with another woman. I am not even sure why I posted this message. I just wanted to voice my pain a little. I never imagined this kind of pain / sorrow before. I realize that with time this will pass and maybe we can become friends again. But in the mean time it really hurts. The advice I need is how to get over her and concentrate on my wife and give her the attention and love she deserves. She's a great woman and I am lucky to have her.
Thank You.

02-05-2008, 09:57 PM	#1 (permalink)
Cam2008 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 5	Crossed The Line I am very hesitant about this post so don't be too cruel. I have been married for 16+ years to a wonderful woman. Have 2 great kids, great job, great house, etc. Everything seems to be just fine. We have very close friends with similar aged kids. I have become very close to one wife in particular. Our feelings have grown as the years go by. A year ago the family moved 7 hours away. I was very distraught over this. It took me a long time to get over the move. Not only did I lose a great guy friend but I lost a very close female friend. Recently we have begun talking more and more. Our feelings have never died I learned even after the move. We have never acted on our feelings in any way. The thought has crossed our minds on more than one occassion. As it turns out we are in love with each other. Or I should say in love with the idea of being with each other. Both families recently vacationed together for 5 days. It was so hard to leave. I have not been the same since. We talk almost daily and all seems to be fine except we are getting closer by every phone call. We have recently told each other that we love each other. We actually think of each other more than we think of our own spouses. We both realize that this is very unhealthy for both marriages and we don't want to do anything to come between our marriages. We realized that if we continue at the present rate, we are both in a lot of trouble down the road. We decided to back off for awhile. No more phone calls. When this happened, I felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest. I am very sad about the whole ordeal even though I know in my heart it's the right thing to do. I have never been emotionally hurt in my life. This is very new to me. I have potentally lost a very dear friend as well as someone I am in love with. I love my wife with all my heart. I always have ever since high school. I do not want to leave her. That's not even an option I am willing to think about. I adore my kids they are great. I could not stand to be apart from them. I realize that I am terrible for falling in love with another woman. I am not even sure why I posted this message. I just wanted to voice my pain a little. I never imagined this kind of pain / sorrow before. I realize that with time this will pass and maybe we can become friends again. But in the mean time it really hurts. The advice I need is how to get over her and concentrate on my wife and give her the attention and love she deserves. She's a great woman and I am lucky to have her. Thank You.