Originally Posted by janrobinson
I wouldn't swear on anything and I have never cheated on my husband. I do not mean to be disrespectful, but I believe it is immature to ask someone to do that. If you can't find any "proof" you should consider believing him, until you find the "proof" you need. My husband did cheat on me, so I know how you feel with needing to know the truth, but it will come. People cannot do things like that and get away with it. You could be ruing your marriage by constantly accuseing and if you find out one day that he didn't ever cheat you will be left with guilt and a bunch of wasted time you spent searching for "proof" that you didn't enjoy him while you had him, because yes, if you continue to accuse he will eventually get tired of that and leave.
I mean no disresect by this, I am only offering advice.
I am not at all offended by your response and do really appreciate what you say. It does indeed worry me that I could become paranoid over my suspicions and gut feelings and I agree with what you say about spending all my time worrying rather than enjoying our time together. Over many years I have used this principle to suppress my gut feelings but this time the worry has persisted for months and months on a daily basis and won't go away like it did in the past. I wish it would because it's agony.
Also, I no longer feel comfortable to be intimate with him which of couse won't belp matters if it turns out he has been faithful.