Originally Posted by Kobo
Could it be that both parties need to realize that an LTR is work and will die if not continually focused on by both parties? The most successful marriages have mutual respect and the desire to make your partner happy and comfortable in the relationship.
It seems to me most nondysfunctional adults can get along fine in marriage for a few years, perhaps three, then the little irritants start to get some real footing but they dont do any real damage for a few more years.
At about the five year mark all the little annoyance residue better have a mechanism to get itself flushed out or frustration starts getting built up to an unmanageable level.
It also seems the patience starts to run real lean after several years of not getting the needed amount and type of passion and companionship.
There seems to be a critical mass of resentment and frustration which can not be tolerated. Everyone has their own unique amount of neglect they can tolerate. If it comes to that before a resolution gets worked out, the marriage is over. Its too late.
Barring the critical mass being reach and dysfunctional behavior, a turnaround is achievable and the methods rather well known. Its either the critical mass of frustration and resentment or the dysfunction that seems to kill the possibility of saving a marriage.