Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - Re-assurance / Appearing weak

RandomDude · 10-15-2011, 02:33 AM

Heh I'm fully straight, yet not homophobic; so I fun-flirt and joke around with gay men too, it's rather funny their reactions really. My wife still doesn't get it though, that when I flirt it's just for fun, I'm not going to touch those women the same way I'm not going to touch those men. I don't know how to change this behaviour of mine regardless; channeling the flirtations to her can be done, but sometimes a joke or a flirt comes to my head in the middle of a conversation with someone else and I just have to say it for fun!

As for motivating her, I made her realise that I can walk last year during our inter-religious crisis. She was trying to get her way selfishly, in total disregard of my views and did whatever she wanted in complete disrespect of me. We also had a long-standing crisis in regards to her sexual demands which we're only recently solving. I just don't want all the dramas again - hence I don't want her to be complacent and think that "ok I can do whatever I want now, he won't mind, and even if he does he won't do anything".

Maybe I just don't trust that she can keep her own demons at bay considering the sh-t she has pulled over the years. She's great now sure, and perhaps I should be more lovey dovey... still, she's the type of woman who can be really great or really b----y.

10-15-2011, 02:33 AM	#6 (permalink)
RandomDude Forum Supporter Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 4,753	Re: Re-assurance / Appearing weak Heh I'm fully straight, yet not homophobic; so I fun-flirt and joke around with gay men too, it's rather funny their reactions really. My wife still doesn't get it though, that when I flirt it's just for fun, I'm not going to touch those women the same way I'm not going to touch those men. I don't know how to change this behaviour of mine regardless; channeling the flirtations to her can be done, but sometimes a joke or a flirt comes to my head in the middle of a conversation with someone else and I just have to say it for fun! As for motivating her, I made her realise that I can walk last year during our inter-religious crisis. She was trying to get her way selfishly, in total disregard of my views and did whatever she wanted in complete disrespect of me. We also had a long-standing crisis in regards to her sexual demands which we're only recently solving. I just don't want all the dramas again - hence I don't want her to be complacent and think that "ok I can do whatever I want now, he won't mind, and even if he does he won't do anything". Maybe I just don't trust that she can keep her own demons at bay considering the sh-t she has pulled over the years. She's great now sure, and perhaps I should be more lovey dovey... still, she's the type of woman who can be really great or really b----y.