Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - Wife is sexual, but doesn't seem to want sex

AnonymousMan · 11-01-2011, 02:34 PM

I am a little confused and looking for a little advice. My wife and I have been together for around 15 years. When we first met, like anyone we had pretty frequent sex, multiple times a day, sometimes, but probably average was 4-5 times a week after maybe the first 6 months, and that seemed to be a good amount for both of us. Honestly, I am really not even an everyday guy, probably an every other day and I am good, after that I start getting irritable

Over the years, there have been some spells here and there, and at one point, I believe we had not had sex for over a month, but this was also during a really hard time in my wifes life, so I understood,and things went back pretty much to normal. During my wifes pregnancies, we also had a pretty good sex life, but after the second child, she was not able to get the weight off, while she certainly lost a good bit of weight, she still has never been happy with her body since then.

That said, I still find her very attractive, and super sexy. Over the past couple of years, she has experienced quite a few issues from emotional to physical related mostly to childbirth, and started frequently rejecting me when I would initiate. Then after completely just leaving it alone, and figuring she would initiate when she was ready, I got blasted for never initiating. The thing is, I was shut down so many times, I lot all confidence, and am not interested in feeling like I am forcing someone into sex. I then tried to get up my courage one time, and felt I was getting mixed signals, tried to initiate sex, and she got really mad at me, and said not now (this was really a killer for me, and made me quite mad at her, and sick of the games).

Over the past year, things have been really strange and sometimes awkward for me. There will be times that we have really great sex, but most of it is me wanting sex, but lacking the courage to initiate for fear of rejection, and then trying to ease into the initiation, but receiving no reciprocation. What makes it stranger is she will do something sexual to me during the day, such as grab me or play grind on me, but then when it comes to later in the evening, it is the same old ****. Basically she has just become a huge tease, and it drives me nuts.

So has anyone ever experienced this, or have any idea of what is going on.

I have never cheated on my wife and don't plan to, but I am tired of living this way. I don't really want to spend the remaining years of my life when I can actually have sex without blue pills to be wasted being teased or rejected. At this point, if this doesn't get straightened out, I want a divorce or an open marriage. The sad thing is, pretty much everything else in our marriage and family life is great.

11-01-2011, 02:34 PM	#1 (permalink)
AnonymousMan Registered User Join Date: Apr 2011 Posts: 3	Wife is sexual, but doesn't seem to want sex I am a little confused and looking for a little advice. My wife and I have been together for around 15 years. When we first met, like anyone we had pretty frequent sex, multiple times a day, sometimes, but probably average was 4-5 times a week after maybe the first 6 months, and that seemed to be a good amount for both of us. Honestly, I am really not even an everyday guy, probably an every other day and I am good, after that I start getting irritable Over the years, there have been some spells here and there, and at one point, I believe we had not had sex for over a month, but this was also during a really hard time in my wifes life, so I understood,and things went back pretty much to normal. During my wifes pregnancies, we also had a pretty good sex life, but after the second child, she was not able to get the weight off, while she certainly lost a good bit of weight, she still has never been happy with her body since then. That said, I still find her very attractive, and super sexy. Over the past couple of years, she has experienced quite a few issues from emotional to physical related mostly to childbirth, and started frequently rejecting me when I would initiate. Then after completely just leaving it alone, and figuring she would initiate when she was ready, I got blasted for never initiating. The thing is, I was shut down so many times, I lot all confidence, and am not interested in feeling like I am forcing someone into sex. I then tried to get up my courage one time, and felt I was getting mixed signals, tried to initiate sex, and she got really mad at me, and said not now (this was really a killer for me, and made me quite mad at her, and sick of the games). Over the past year, things have been really strange and sometimes awkward for me. There will be times that we have really great sex, but most of it is me wanting sex, but lacking the courage to initiate for fear of rejection, and then trying to ease into the initiation, but receiving no reciprocation. What makes it stranger is she will do something sexual to me during the day, such as grab me or play grind on me, but then when it comes to later in the evening, it is the same old ****. Basically she has just become a huge tease, and it drives me nuts. So has anyone ever experienced this, or have any idea of what is going on. I have never cheated on my wife and don't plan to, but I am tired of living this way. I don't really want to spend the remaining years of my life when I can actually have sex without blue pills to be wasted being teased or rejected. At this point, if this doesn't get straightened out, I want a divorce or an open marriage. The sad thing is, pretty much everything else in our marriage and family life is great.