Ready To Give Up

I have no problem with him playing sports, it's healthy for someone to do what they love. It's just, I guess it hurts that chooses sports over me and the kids. He has played sports ever since i can remember knowing him(known each other 8yrs). He plays basketball, ballhockey, football. We are seperated, live in seperate places. I have the kids all week and we spend weekends together. I don't mind him going to local tournaments, it's just the ones that are far away that really really bug me. He chose to go to a tournament that's 10hrs away and he has history with a female over there that makes me uncomfortable. I love watching him play sports, cheering him on. Me and the kids have a blast going to his tournaments. But, it's just, I mean, he doesn't see us all week and he decides to ditch town for sports - that's what's really bothering me. I look forward to spending time with him on weekends and so do our kids. It also gives me a bit of a break from our 2yr old since he's A LOT to handle right now his attention is mostly on his daddy and not getting into trouble. But, I just feel like it cut into our "family time" and now we have to wait another week to see him and my 2yr old is wondering why daddy didn't come see him this weekend. I don't play sports but I love dancing and have danced all sorts of dances throughout my life. But, like i say, I don't have a whole lot of free time away from my children to do what I enjoy because I have them all week and I don't have a whole lot of babysitters that are reliable or would commit to watching them weekly. So I guess I compromise my whole darn life for my babies. And i guess i feel resentful that he goes out and enjoys his life and plays sports while I am stuck at home. I don't feel like he puts enough effort into taking the kids off my hands so I can do things for myself. He has promised to watch them more int he past but his sports ALWAYS got in the way of that...something always came up where he couldn't take them. And I guess I am resentful for that too...that he promised me but never followed through. He did take them a couple of days ago so I could get my hair done but he kept bringing the kids into the salon so it didn't feel like much of a break from them. I just feel like he falls short in so many ways. I do understand though when somebody loves something like baseball or football or whatever...it's just when it starts affecting our relationship there should be some kind of compromise and he has told me he has compromised in the past and felt wrong about it but says he will no longer let me get in the way of going to EVERY tournament that comes up. I just don't feel like that is fair.