Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - Sexless marriage: 24-years-old and married barely a year

teddybear12 · 12-17-2011, 12:25 PM

I'm in a similar situation as you are... I'm 23, and am in a sexless marriage. And the sex that we do have feels empty because I know she is not enjoying it. Our first year together we had sex several times a day. After getting engaged a year into our relationship, she tells me that she doesn't enjoy sex at all. I went with it thinking that it would one day resolve itself. 4 years later, it's only declined. It is seriously hurting our relationship and will likely end in divorce. I love her to death and I know that she loves me but a marriage without sex/affection is not a marriage but a friendship.

You really need to face this issue head on and work things out NOW. Because if you don't, it will end with you divorcing each other several years down the road. My best advice is to go to a psychiatrist. My university has free counseling services and it has helped a lot, yours will likely have one too... specifically ask for a psychiatrist, there is a major difference between a marriage counselor and a psychiatrist. A psychiatrist has to go through medical school and then a 4 year residency to become a psychiatrist. A marriage counselor is a graduates degree program.

Another thing... Don't do anything that you will regret several years down the road. If you keep badgering her about sex, she will associate sex with something that is unpleasant and it will only make things worse(speaking with experience here). The best thing you can do is show your support and love for her to make this change in your relationship TOGETHER. But seriously, stop playing the blame game, it won't lead anywhere good.

12-17-2011, 12:25 PM	#49 (permalink)
teddybear12 Registered User Join Date: Dec 2011 Posts: 4	Re: Sexless marriage: 24-years-old and married barely a year I'm in a similar situation as you are... I'm 23, and am in a sexless marriage. And the sex that we do have feels empty because I know she is not enjoying it. Our first year together we had sex several times a day. After getting engaged a year into our relationship, she tells me that she doesn't enjoy sex at all. I went with it thinking that it would one day resolve itself. 4 years later, it's only declined. It is seriously hurting our relationship and will likely end in divorce. I love her to death and I know that she loves me but a marriage without sex/affection is not a marriage but a friendship. You really need to face this issue head on and work things out NOW. Because if you don't, it will end with you divorcing each other several years down the road. My best advice is to go to a psychiatrist. My university has free counseling services and it has helped a lot, yours will likely have one too... specifically ask for a psychiatrist, there is a major difference between a marriage counselor and a psychiatrist. A psychiatrist has to go through medical school and then a 4 year residency to become a psychiatrist. A marriage counselor is a graduates degree program. Another thing... Don't do anything that you will regret several years down the road. If you keep badgering her about sex, she will associate sex with something that is unpleasant and it will only make things worse(speaking with experience here). The best thing you can do is show your support and love for her to make this change in your relationship TOGETHER. But seriously, stop playing the blame game, it won't lead anywhere good.