Edit: In regard to his alleged CDV: I talked to the police that night, and they said that even though I claimed nothing happened, there was no mark or evidence that anything had actually happened, there was someone who simply thought they had seen something, and according to state law, that is actually enough to arrest and charge him. Even the police said they wanted to let him go home, but they had to go by the books. My family is not used to anyone getting arrested (except for my sister, who has two DUI's), so this would have/is freaking them out. They also worry more about what other people think than the truth. How come your family is so understanding to your sister? Sounds like you are the family scapegoat.
My fiance doesn't drink every day. He has made some bad decisions (i.e., stupid bar fights) while drunk, but he's paid his dues. He admits when he screws up and takes responsiblity for his actions. At least he takes responsibility. For your sake and for his, I hope that the bar fights stop.
Also, we are paying for our wedding. We discussed that months ago. We are planning on a small beach wedding. But, I'm actually at the point where I don't care. I just want to marry him. My dream of being his wife definitely outweighs my dream of a wedding.That is how I felt when I got married. You can always have a vow renewal later.
I admit, it has taken me awhile to cut the cord. My mom has a tendency to try to buy me I guess....if she sees I'm in a bad spot, she'll just throw money at it, but she always turns it around at some point and throws it back in my face. Accepting financial help from her was my fault and my mistake. My fiance and I both work full-time, so we are taking care of our own bills. My ex used to encourage me taking money from my mom so he wouldn't have to work as hard to help pay the bills. Like I said, a really bad guy. Some parents try to control adult children with money. This is one of the reasons I couldn't accept my parent's wedding offer. My mother would use it as a reason to guilt us into living for her.
I've talked to a few of my friends, and even my coworkers, about my family's reaction, and they are all very angry about it. They are giving us nothing but their love and support, which means a lot. I just wish I could have the same from my family. But, you're right, I can't make them care. Life is way too short to try to please others.I believe that your family will come around, once they realize that they can't use intimidation to run your life.