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post #1 of (permalink) Old 12-22-2011, 05:40 PM Thread Starter
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Join Date: Dec 2011
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Sister in law Issues

I will try and make this as short as possible. So I've been with my hubby for over 6 years before we finally got a civil ceremony. We are doing the ceremonial wedding in april. Next thing is that he has an older sister who is a very big control freak. She is extremely succesful and thus thinks her word is gold. I've tried being nice to her and right when I think w emight get along, something else will come along. A few examples
- She rarely returns my phone calls even when I call to wish her happy birthday.
-She doesn't even thank me when I got her new born baby boy some gifts and sent it with my hubby (bf at the time) when he went to visit. (We lived on the other end of the country and I couldnt make it).
- My hubby and I graduated from medschool and are applying for residency positions. She told hubby the only reason I got many interviews is becasue Im a girl....seriously? I don't mean to be braggy but I think I deserve it.

- And now, the latest addition (the last straw in my mind as I've let ALL the other incidents slide).
-Since we don;t have jobs right now his parents are paying for my ring. (which is common in Indian traditions. My husband and I are both American but of Indian origin). She messaged me saying " I I need to know what kind of ring you want. We all want a 10 karat ring but my parents are paying for it and not my brother so it has to be reasonable".

Honestly speaking, REALLY bothered me. My family is getting her jewellery as well (traditions yet again, although I'm tempted to give her a piece of coal and call it a day!) Anyway, I would never ever consider telling her "my parents are paying for your jewellery so make it reasonable!" Just typing it out makes me feel like I'm being extremely rude.

I called her today and told her I appreciate all her help but that her comment was a tad bit unecessary.

She lost it on me and told me that it was a joke and that I am going to cause problems for everyone if I dont grow up. I said I didn't really think it was funny and I felt like it wasn't nice especially since I would obviously be reasonable. She got really angry and even went as far as to say "Im doing you a favor by letting you have a say in your ring instead of just picking it out for you." Like wow . She just continued to yell at me until my hubby just took the phone from me. She then proceeded to yell at him too , especially for getting involved and taking my side.

I've had it with her! I really am at my wits end and don't know what ot do. If it truly was a joke why not just say "Hey it was a joke Sorry you took it that way" but instead she got angry and started yelling.

I apologize for the length but I really really just don't know what to do ! Hubby's mad now since he feels like he's stuck in the middle. I feel so alone!

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