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Mrs. Mongalo · 03-08-2008, 09:07 AM

"Your wife doesn't hate your kids, she is feeling threatened by them. To her you are putting the first woman and her kids with you, ahead of her and the daughter you had together. It is natural protective instinct. She feels her daughter is not getting the love and attention you are giving to the other 'first' kids."

I AGREE fully!! I am married to the love of my life, and together we have a beautiful little girl.. Well my husband has a 3 yeard old son with a woman who he could not stand from the start, but because she was EASY he just stuck with it... In the beginning of our relationship this woman stalked us, called us, harassed us in every sense of the word... She would constantly tell me that I am nothing to her sin just a babysitter, and to stay away from him... Over time, that wore me down and I just stopped paying attention to him... Then when she found out I was pregnant, she actually called me and said " YOU WILL GET WHAT YOU DESERVE, I HOPE YOUR BABY DIES".. Imagine what that did to me!! Then she would say "Well at least now youcan stop PRETENDING with mine"... So yeah, I was put through HELL for a while...

Well, now things have calmed down and everyone is civil... However my relationship with my step son has never returned to what it used to be... It doesnt help that my mother in law blatantly FAVORS him over MY daughter right there in front of me! And trust me I do not imagine this... Members of my husbands OWN family have confirmed that with me... It is just sooooo hard to WANT my stepson around! Also, in the Hispanic culture the FIRST born is ALWAYS treated differently, and I KNOW that... They all make it very clear that my stepson came FIRST!!

Sometimes I just wanna scream to all of them "MY HUSBAND DIDNT EVEN WANT THIS KID... HE HIMSELF KNOWS HE SHOULD NOT HAVE MESSED AROUND WITH THAT WOMAN AND JUST BECAUSE HE IS THE FIRST BORN TO YOU, HE IS NOT TO ME, AND I EXPECT MY DAUGHTER TO BE TREATED THE SAME!!!"

So believe me, she does not HATE your kids... But she probably DOES feel some resentment that they are not HERS with you!! Its never fun to deal with baby momma drama and kids from another relationship that just reminds her constantly that you have a past... Now granted she KNEW that when she met you... But it doesnt make it easier... Just be patient with her... And really be sure that when its you, her and YOUR child to give them extra attention and extra love... Because she might not be feeling that from you... She might be feeling that you dont love THIS child as much as your others because this one was not your FIRST... And this IS her first... If I remember correctly... So just make sure to remind her that THIS child was born out of LOVE... Unlike the first 2... And that might make her feel a little more assured that her and your daughter are just as much a priority as your other kids...

03-08-2008, 09:07 AM	#20 (permalink)
Mrs. Mongalo Registered User Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Texas... Posts: 1	Re: My Wife Hates My Kids "Your wife doesn't hate your kids, she is feeling threatened by them. To her you are putting the first woman and her kids with you, ahead of her and the daughter you had together. It is natural protective instinct. She feels her daughter is not getting the love and attention you are giving to the other 'first' kids." I AGREE fully!! I am married to the love of my life, and together we have a beautiful little girl.. Well my husband has a 3 yeard old son with a woman who he could not stand from the start, but because she was EASY he just stuck with it... In the beginning of our relationship this woman stalked us, called us, harassed us in every sense of the word... She would constantly tell me that I am nothing to her sin just a babysitter, and to stay away from him... Over time, that wore me down and I just stopped paying attention to him... Then when she found out I was pregnant, she actually called me and said " YOU WILL GET WHAT YOU DESERVE, I HOPE YOUR BABY DIES".. Imagine what that did to me!! Then she would say "Well at least now youcan stop PRETENDING with mine"... So yeah, I was put through HELL for a while... Well, now things have calmed down and everyone is civil... However my relationship with my step son has never returned to what it used to be... It doesnt help that my mother in law blatantly FAVORS him over MY daughter right there in front of me! And trust me I do not imagine this... Members of my husbands OWN family have confirmed that with me... It is just sooooo hard to WANT my stepson around! Also, in the Hispanic culture the FIRST born is ALWAYS treated differently, and I KNOW that... They all make it very clear that my stepson came FIRST!! Sometimes I just wanna scream to all of them "MY HUSBAND DIDNT EVEN WANT THIS KID... HE HIMSELF KNOWS HE SHOULD NOT HAVE MESSED AROUND WITH THAT WOMAN AND JUST BECAUSE HE IS THE FIRST BORN TO YOU, HE IS NOT TO ME, AND I EXPECT MY DAUGHTER TO BE TREATED THE SAME!!!" So believe me, she does not HATE your kids... But she probably DOES feel some resentment that they are not HERS with you!! Its never fun to deal with baby momma drama and kids from another relationship that just reminds her constantly that you have a past... Now granted she KNEW that when she met you... But it doesnt make it easier... Just be patient with her... And really be sure that when its you, her and YOUR child to give them extra attention and extra love... Because she might not be feeling that from you... She might be feeling that you dont love THIS child as much as your others because this one was not your FIRST... And this IS her first... If I remember correctly... So just make sure to remind her that THIS child was born out of LOVE... Unlike the first 2... And that might make her feel a little more assured that her and your daughter are just as much a priority as your other kids...