kirablue

Hi Red,

I am going to ask you at the outset to forgive me if anything I say hurts your feelings........you talk about cheating, your husband DID cheat on you, to me the whole thing is very clear. Your husband wanted to have sex with another or other women, he attempted and succeded in manipulating you into going along with it. He did cheat on you and you are clearly hurt about it, yet trying in some way to justify or take blame for it to make it all alright. Please understand I realize this is my opinion........marriage is a lifelong commitment, designed to provide love, respect and faithfullness to both involved, your husband has attempted and succeded in turning it into a game, and games, by design, have winners and losers. I think that you are deeply hurt, no one ever wins when adultery is involved, there is a deep tearing. You said he had the mid-life crisis 2 years ago, but just recently had intercourse with another woman, thats a long time that you have been dealing with his interest in having sex with other people or "playing" as you so delicatley put it. I believe you are arguing because the real issue has not been dealt with, your husband set out and succeeded in cheating on you, involved you in it, so he would not have to take responsibility for adultery. If your child came to you and said "mom I am having a mid-child crisis and I need to rob a bank' would you go along with it? Your husband came to you with a "mid-life" crisis and robbed you red, I am very sorry that this happened to you.