Quote:
Originally Posted by blind
James-son - are the marriage weekend, cruise and vacation what you want or are they what she needs? Take my advice for what it is worth but I would be careful not to put your wants before her needs right now. This is especially true if there are further issues that aren't in the open just yet. I hope her counseling gives you both some more information as to what the issues are. Read the book you ordered. It will help give you some perspective. Don't expect miracles in a month or two. Best of luck and take care.
Blind
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Blind,
When do you stop compromising our dreams and goals to make your spouse happy? A year, maybe three years, or twenty years? Should marriage feel like you made a deal with the devil and now you have to live with ever changing terms? At what point do you acknowledge the breech on contract and say I married you for these reasons, and you’re not like that anymore!
YOU SAY “give her time” “meet her needs and over time she will find it in her heart to meet yours” is that when the blue birds come down with flowers and place them gently in her hair.
How many married couples do we all know, where the husband has settled for less and took that secured job at post office and worked there for twenty years to finance a 2000 squire foot home for his wife and kids. Buying the used mini van….now after twenty years of marriage he is bald and fat with high blood pressure, never smiles, and his only retreat is work that he hates being at. He looks in the mirror everyday and ask “what happen to you?” This man compromised his life for his wife “yes dear, yeas dear” to make her happy.
Every day his wife nags him, with age she is more like a mother then a wife to him, complains about him not making enough money, she want to enroll the kids into this or that and has his weekends planned at for him a month in advance. “yes dear, yeas dear”
We all know these married couples and I watch then men in those marriages compromise themselves right into a joyless life. Eat, Sleep and **** is what they look forward to in life.
Life is to short to be unhappy …how long is too long to compromise a human’s life
Are we as men, that insecure of ourselves that we need a secretly blanket beside us, no matter what the cost is? My experience of loneliness is not having someone to love, it’s when that person of twenty years stops loving you back, and that is loneliness.