Talk About Marriage - View Single Post - Dealing with lonliness
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Old 02-05-2012, 10:36 PM   #15 (permalink)
Starfish girl
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 24
Default Re: Dealing with lonliness

Quote:
Originally Posted by CSeryllum View Post
Here's my experience. I am 26. I am about to receive divorce papers (sometime this week)...I work a job with no supervision, my boss is 4 hours away. I have no real co-workers. No opportunities to make friends.

I live where I live, because I moved here with my wife, when she got a job..sacrificed everything to be here for her...I have been here for 2 years. I have zero friends here.

I now live in an apartment because I had to move out...The apartment has no furniture other than my bed. I have nothing in it...it would take me about an hour to move out...I also have no pets.

Do I get lonely? Hell yes. This place is a prison cell with an open door. The difference is, no matter how far I go during the day, I always have to come back at night....it's very sad, and very lonely.

How do I cope?

I play online games with real people involved...meeting them online isn't as good as RL, but it's good to have some connection.
I talk on forums like this, getting perspective from others, just as you are doing now...reading posts really makes you feel somewhat less lonely.
I live an active lifestyle...I run, lift weights, and rock climb. Endorphins are good.
I have a rock-climbing gym I go to...i know all the staff, and many of the patrons...sure they are only "casual friends" that I only talk to while i'm at the gym...but that could change...when I'm ready for it to.
I talk to friends and family that live in other states when I can.
I play guitar...keep busy with my hobbies etc.

I just ....cope.

It's sad, absolutely. Lonely, no doubt...Last time someone gave me a hug? or an affectionate touch of any kind...been like 4 months. Closest physical contact I've had was a handshake.

Eventually, you just deal with it. It's not ideal, but you survive it and keep going forward. Just remind yourself the way I do, "it's not always going to be like this." and realize that the future is unknown.

Anything could happen. My wife could decide 2 years from now, or tomorrow, that she wants to get back together...I could get killed in a car wreck...I could get a promotion, move across the country, and meet a wonderful woman who truly loves me for me...ANYTHING can happen, just remember that.
Your story and how you are handling things inspire me. I like what you said about anything can happen, you never know. Thats why we all shouldn't give up and just take it one day at a time one breath at a time. Hugs to you my friend.
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