i can relate to these stories in my own life. i met my wife when she was 16, and i was 20. we dated 6 months. i felt like she was the love of my life. i wanted to spend all my time with her. we attempted sex around five months into our relationship. she was a virgin, i was not. the day we attempted she was seventeen ,and i was twenty one. i entered her to her hymen, i looked up and noticed her crying . i ask what was wrong she replied " she was afraid of getting pregnant, what her mom would think of her." i pulled out, and that was the only time during the six months we attempted to have sex. we broke up about six weeks later, due to lies that was spread . at that time i was glad we did not have intercourse ,it would have left me with guilt. after we was broke up she kept trying to get back with me for the next three months. she gave me a card , got to me but i did not respond to her. we was broke up for eighteen months. during that time i dated no one. we got back together i called her up and ask her out. i pulled in to her drive way it felt like i was back were i belonged. after a couple of dates she told me she had been with somebody. i got to questioning her she had been with eight guys in fifteen month period. i was sick, my heart was ripped into. i broke up with her once and i was not going to breakup again . i felt like it would be throwing her back to the wolves. i loved her and did not want any other woman in the world. i felt we were made for each other, and that God had brought her into my life. with my past i felt like i did not deserve a virgin, but i was questioning God why did this happen to her, why her. it was and still has been very rough in me dealing with she was a virgin before we broke up , and was not when we got back together. during the time we was apart i had became a christian . i know that i was still in love with her inspite of all that happened while we was apart, and did not want to live my life without her. we dated for five months and got married , i made love to her for the first time the morning after we was married . i went into the airforce, we had to kids, raised a family. we have been married 29 years now. yes her past has bothered me,and a lot . this past year was real bad, i became depressed from thinking about it. i could not sleep ,eat, could not stop thinking about it. it has bothered me in the past but not like this past year, i guess around 10 years of marriage her past bothered me bad, but nothing like this past year. i got through it by not dwelling on my hurt , but by extending ,and practicing total forgiveness and unconditional love to her. which she deserves. over the years she will not talk about what happened , or details of that time we was apart. she tries to block it out of her mind and let it die. the only think she has said to me about her past is " i did a lot of things i wish i would not have done". this is my story , and i would still have married her again. i still feel like she is the only woman in the world for me, can not see being with anyone else. i love her.
