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Chopblock · 03-21-2008, 01:18 PM

I am a man in the same position as your husband, let me tell you that I can't remember the last time the wait between sex was "only a week". The latest drought is 6 months and counting, with 2 months droughts in between.

The person who said that you both want the same thing but neither of you want to give in is spot on the money. If you sit there thinking that you are right and HE should give in, then you won't get ANYWHERE! You have to recognize that he is sitting there thinking YOU should give in. Those two things are mutually exclusive.

In the course of the thread, you revealed how he doesn't help with the housework. If he did that more, would that help? What I mean is, many men want direct and immediate results -- helping fold laundry here = a bj there. I'm not saying this to be vulgar, I'm telling you how some of us think. Is it realistic..... well how much more likely are you to stick to a diet if you lose a pound in the first week?

So do you want to put your hands on your hips and believe he is selfish and irrational and if only he did "this and that" everything would be fine? Or do you want to solve the problem?

I remember a guy at a dance who could get any woman he wanted to dance with him -- laughing and having a blast all the while. I couldn't do it! I asked him how he did it and he said "you just have to DO it -- go up, be confident, believe in yourself". At first I said "no way is this gonna work" but I tried it A FEW TIMES (didn't just give up after the first failure). Before I knew it, it WAS WORKING, and I felt so dumb for overlooking the obvious.

Sometimes success and a positive attitude are their own fuels. The more confident you are in finding a solution you once thought impossible, the more apt that solution is to succeed.

03-21-2008, 01:18 PM	#17 (permalink)
Chopblock Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 117	Re: still fighting about sex I am a man in the same position as your husband, let me tell you that I can't remember the last time the wait between sex was "only a week". The latest drought is 6 months and counting, with 2 months droughts in between. The person who said that you both want the same thing but neither of you want to give in is spot on the money. If you sit there thinking that you are right and HE should give in, then you won't get ANYWHERE! You have to recognize that he is sitting there thinking YOU should give in. Those two things are mutually exclusive. In the course of the thread, you revealed how he doesn't help with the housework. If he did that more, would that help? What I mean is, many men want direct and immediate results -- helping fold laundry here = a bj there. I'm not saying this to be vulgar, I'm telling you how some of us think. Is it realistic..... well how much more likely are you to stick to a diet if you lose a pound in the first week? So do you want to put your hands on your hips and believe he is selfish and irrational and if only he did "this and that" everything would be fine? Or do you want to solve the problem? I remember a guy at a dance who could get any woman he wanted to dance with him -- laughing and having a blast all the while. I couldn't do it! I asked him how he did it and he said "you just have to DO it -- go up, be confident, believe in yourself". At first I said "no way is this gonna work" but I tried it A FEW TIMES (didn't just give up after the first failure). Before I knew it, it WAS WORKING, and I felt so dumb for overlooking the obvious. Sometimes success and a positive attitude are their own fuels. The more confident you are in finding a solution you once thought impossible, the more apt that solution is to succeed.