Re: Help a friend
A) Stop it and cut all ties. This is a good step you have already done. It is important that this is pointed out in the session as part of the recovery.
B) The need to rebuild trust. If he wants the relationship to work then he needs to be able to trust. Mostly this is something that will take many months or years to do.
C) Take an honest look at your relationship. Fix it. Talk about whatever it is that you where missing in the relationship. Did you miss physical touch? Then make it a point to kiss, hug and hold hands all the time. Having a bond that you never go your seperate ways without a kiss and a hug, always spending part of the night cuddling before bedtime and just holding hands when you go out somewheres can be very important.
D) Learn to communicate better. Talk everyday even if it seems like trivial stuff, and learn to listen too. An easy way to head off problems or fix them is in the art of communication.
I think the most important thing to tell your hubby in counsiling and out is that you want to work on the marriage and are willing to go that extra mile to not only fix it but make it better.
best of luck,
draconis
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