Originally Posted by elph
as well everybody acts like my wife is some viscous harpy intent on destroying all that comes in her path.thats not the case. im not saying she perfect, obviously. but shes not one of those who is looking to just up and runa way with teh OM and start a new life with the OM. if she was, she woulda done it already. and as i mentioned, shes broken up with him 5 times, all of her own accord. and with nobody else pressuring her. The OM thoght knows exactly how to push her buttons to bring her back into the fold. (the old ignoiring trick, which has always worked really well). shes usually a good person, a good person who had a complete lack of boundaries, a good person who has made some horrendous decisions. a good person whose insanely naive. good person who went down that slippery slope, and by the time she realized what was going on, her emotions were all involved.
im not saying that what shes doing isnt wrong. and im not trying to defend her. her actions speak plenty. but i also take the whole view of who she is, at teh begining of the affair and for those first 6 months, she was the "alien who possesed my wife " kinda person. as my therapist said. right now shes a different person, totally self absorbed. but i aslo know the woman i married is in thre somewhere.
It would have been better for you to detach if she simply did run away into the arms of the OM. Instead, she's more sly and keeping you as the back up plan. She's a cake eater. To me, that's even worse because that's f*cking with your emotions and those of your child. It's a pity that you can't be alpha like the OM, which is why she keeps running back to him over and over and over again.
And with that, I shall bow out of this thread. It's been repeated over and over again. Some BSs simply can't get out of their own fog.