Originally Posted by sd212
Our stories are so stinking similar! Well, except that darn OM thing I have to deal w/ that you don't
Really though, my stbxw and I took a day trip this week w/ the kids and pretended to be a happy family. Then, she asked me again to go on family vacation this summer. i really hope it is hope for R but I really don't think it is. I think these folks are right, it is her absolving herself of guilt. That, and she would much prefer I do all the driving to the beach! How can these women think this is OK!??!!?! Honestly, Jayb, we will never get over them if we keep going down these roads.
Well, I'm beginning to question if I really want to get back, because she isn't the person I married and loved years ago. So, why am I improving me, learning, loving.....to get with someone who has changed, and, is so different than I? And, as I am making these changes for me/us, she doesn't do anything??? I'm starting to understand the mutuality that needs to be involved with R.
I love spending time with my family. Even her, because I'm not so obsessed with analyzing every move or word. Rather, I'm laid back. And, she thinks it's ok, because she is so detached and assumes that since I know (have been told) she has no hope for our M, then, we might as well be friends.
I was told to use my anger in a purposeful way. To detach.
Now understand, I'm thinking about all this at the same time I think about us R. Even after any kind of R, we have issues to work on. So, it's hard, hard work that can't be done by only 1 person and must be a mutual decision for the right reasons.
1 minute at a time. I've been praying like never before.