Beechnut

Wow..you do know how I feel! I agree with everything you've said. I have read a lot about it too, and have found the same things as you. I really think my husband was highly stressed, at work and at home,so cranky all the time, I was super stressed with these kids and well probably wasn't a whole lot of fun to be around either, so porn was his solution. And I've got to tell you, since all this has come out in the open; the cranky man has gone away. Maybe in some way he is relieved that he doesn’t have to hide his dirty little secret anymore...maybe? Okay so enough already...he didn't set out to hurt me, and he is truly sorry that he did, let’s move on, the end. So now about this everyday affection thing I was complaining about. I think you are right that it just isn't in his personality, and it is so frustrating. He is very receptive to my affection, so I'm going to just calm down about the whole thing. And he does show his love in other ways, I feel foolish, but I had forgotten about all the times he'll bring me a drink, asks me if I want a blanket, carries the groceries in for me. And the biggest one of all, a vasectomy (Scheduled for next week) for a guy who hates the dentist !! But he told me he felt like it was the right thing to do and didn't want me to have to have major surgery (tubes tied) so there you have it. And then I got to thinking, it’s not fair for me to want him to show affection the same way I do...he's not me. Ah-ha now I'm starting to get it! But...why are his advances for sex so few? I know during the week he is tired at the end of the day, but come on, what man is too tired for sex? Its not like he doesn't have the opportunity, we share the same bed. And, plenty of times I come to bed just a few minutes after him, and no acknowledgement from him that I'm there, not even a hug goodnight...now whats up with that? Do I just want too much? Thank you Swedish for your reply....what a huge help.