| | Re: Didn't love him when we got married
Well, I married a man I didn't love. This was twelve years ago now.
I was twenty-one. My heart was broken by a guy I loved, he dumped me. At the same time my dad told me I was a worthless piece of trash and no one would ever love me. I met this man through some friends. He was friendly and I started dating him, he should have been a rebound. But, he wanted to marry me and I figured, I guess marrying someone who wanted to marry you was better than being alone forever. But I didn't love him.
We dated three months then got married. He was 25 and I was 21. The friendliness went away. He was a con-man. He was very selfish and condesending. Treated me like I was a little girl with no brain. Left me alone most of the time. I had a big inheritance from my mother who was passed away. He took all of that money and spent it. Once he spent $30,000 in three days. At 23 I had a child, and I was glad I had my child because he was my only companion.
I was married to a man I didn't love and was slowly growing to hate. I told him I didn't love him but didn't know what to do. He started forcing himself on me (yes, we were married but that doesn't matter.) I was terrified of him. But when I was 25 I met a man that I fell in love with. So, I built up courage and left my ex-husband.
I didn't take alimony, because I knew what I had done was wrong. He left me over $30,000 in debt and homeless, when I met him I had over $150,000 in savings. Because I was homeless he got custody of my son. I married the man I met, he is now my husband, adn I have two more sons. We live paycheck to paycheck, but I was always happy because I was with the man I love.
But, now I am almost 33 and I fear karma is come after me. Because although I endured having him force himself on me, and I lost my oldest son, which almost killed me, and was homeless, and lost all my money... now my husband sometimes he is still my husband who loves me. Other times he acts like he hates me. Sometimes he is the man I married. Sometimes he is mean and cold. And now he spends no time with me, just locks himself up in his office. Karma comes back 10x10 on you.
So, you may leave and be happier, but karma will come. A loveless marriage is no marriage at all. But karama comes back for what you did for selfishness.