She came back!!!! Well, sort of.
Not going to detail all of it b/c there is no need. Here is the short version. This doesn't go in the Reconciliation section, here is why.
Bottom line is that hours before we were supposed to sign she came back. Said she ended it with the OM. Loves me, is in love with me. Wants our family back. No begging or anything like that. Didn't say anything like "I'll do whatever it takes." She just said she doesn't want a divorce and doesn't want this. Said she wants to go to counseling but she can't guarantee me she won't have the feelings again that made her leave.
We cancelled the signing appointment.
Well, on one hand it is a dream come true. My beautiful soul mate finally came back. Yea well, not exactly how I had pictured it. Feeling alot like a backup plan right now. Since she "came back" nothing has really changed. She has been hot at times and cold at times. Says she is very confused right now.
Right now I'm just respecting her space and giving her time to figure out what the heck is going on in her head. I love her. I want our family more than life itself. BUT, I was right on the edge of moving on and accepting the D. Queue anxiety all over again.
My God, what do I do?