04-15-2012, 12:27 PM
Join Date: Sep 2009
Originally Posted by Laureen
I just wanted to respond as a woman who constantly had sex because my husband never stops thinking about it... He is mid 40 and he walks around as stiff as a teenager.
Today, thank God, my husband has come to learn that he has never shown me respect in that area of our lives. (there were many, many areas - which are all being addressed) but I am just replying to the daily sex.
If your wife is counting the days til your sex drive lowers, why in the hell would you be having daily sex? You DO sound like someone obsessed if you cannot give your wife a few nights of peace per week. Sex IS important in a marriage. It is important that when ONE does not feel like it, she is not doing it to 'keep you happy'... This is an area of negotiation. I can tell you that when my desire for daily sex, fell down to a few days a week and my husband would push and beg and grind the other nights until I finally gave in (force), soon my drive dwindled to never bet I still had to do it all the time in order to 'make him happy' so I could get rest.
It is selfish, disrespectful and abusive to be having it daily when you clearly know damn right well that she does not want it daily. Not giving you a hard time here but just giving you the perspective of a woman who is married to man with a drive like yours.
Today, while we are working on our marriage I want NOTHING to do with sex - now that he is actually being respectful and not insisting on it daily and making it a requirement in order that I get peace. Today, he is willing to negotiate it and accept 2 to 3 nights a week and unfortunately, now that he has spent so many years abusing this area of our relationship, I am still just 'giving in' on those occasions. I DO get turned on. I DO want sex. I AM responsive and often I am throbbing when I get into bed, but I look at HIM and it is GONE! So, I quietly scream in my head while I paste on a smile and pretend that I want it those 2 to 3 times a week.
No, I am NOT screwed up. NO, I am NOT a prude. I LOVE sex.. the problem is I don't trust or respect him in the bedroom any longer because he spent years thinking ONLY about HIS desires and never caring for a second about me.
So, if you know your wife does not feel like it daily and she is doing it daily anyways - with a smile on her face - she may be carrying resentments against you. You are very unfair to HER. It is cruel and abusive.
Thank you for sharing. What you said is helpful for my own situation laureen. Posted via Mobile Device