| | Re: Recovering from Codependency
Well separation from my soon to be ex has sure made me deal with my co-dependency issues :-)
My wife said something similar towards the end that I need to find validation through myself, not just through her. I think the recovery process is slow going sometimes, the first step is realizing that you were co-dependent. I was only co-dependent the last year of my marriage, when I could tell things were going wrong.
You have to look in the mirror, and not be afraid of the person staring back at you. You have to love yourself first, before you can love anyone else. What I've learned through my divorce care class is that you have to be comfortable with being alone on a Saturday night and not feel like a failure. All of this is easier said than done, but it's true.
I used to think that the only way I was going to get through this was by having others pick me up, carry me through. That's not true...I'm going to get through this because I';m going to pick myself up, carry myself through. I have to stand on my own two feet so that I will never be knocked down again. More importantly, I have to be tough so that my children can be okay.
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