angry and resentful..
I guess I'm here to have a bit of a vent and also to find out what others would do in my situation or have done in the past to try and resolve the particular issue.
There are lots of issues I am dealing with atm but mainly in regards to my partner the issue is this..
1 yr ago my partner did something that was abusive to me and at the time and still now, I consider a deal breaker and something that I wouldnt tolerate. At the time I left him for three weeks and then returned with the false hope that he would admit what he had done and apologize. He did apologize and promise to change etc. He has not done this "deal breaker" act since however his behaviour overall has not changed at all. He has not admitted to what he had done and refuses to name it for what it is or take responsibility, all though he is sorry, it is still my fault.
I may be stupid to think this but I honestly believe if he had tried to admit what he had done, sought counselling for it, made an effort to change or at the very least stopped blaming it on me than I would feel differently. I may be wrong and maybe even if he had sought counselling or admitted the truth I would still be bitter and angry over the whole thing..
Is it fair to leave the relationship over an issue that occured over a year ago? Is it fair or just plain stupid to hold onto all that anger and resentment? I feel I have every right to be angry and that I am justified in feeling the way that I do but he seems to think it's "nothing" and not his fault, just like everything else that goes wrong is also my fault..
I am so filled with anger and resentment and mostly pain. How could someone that "loves" me cause that pain? and willingly and deliberately do so? I dont feel he is trust worthy and at times i feel scared of him.. That is no way to be in a relationship and it is f'd up because I am now 4 months pregnant to him..
Scared and confused :s