swedish

It amazes me to see how similar our situations are. My husband has said it's all him also. He has also shed some tears for the first time since I've known him and I know he feels horrible. He has said you've always been loving toward me, never argue, nag, give him his space, etc. so it made it more difficult for me to understand why he would stray. We are both introverted and have never had many heart to heart talks or shared feelings with each other (or anyone else for that matter) and that is really the only area that we have changed, but for us it was huge. The only thing I can gather is that the woman went through a second bad divorce, ex is an alcoholic and just lost his job, so she was having financial struggles and started pouring her heart out to him at work saying 'i need to meet someone like you' and he just couldn't resist the attention, feeling needed and the excitement of something new. I think the turning point for him was seeing me break down (there was a 2 week period where the signs were all there) and he realized he really loved me and knew that I loved him. He ended it (it was 2 weeks of going to lunch and kissing never had sex but he says it was definitely leading in that direction) the next day and was not going to tell me. I found out because on that day he left his cell phone at home and I spent the day alternating between panic attacks and snooping. I do know how you feel. I have my good days and bad days as well. I know I didn't deserve this, but I also know I want for us both to be happy in our marriage, not for him to stay out of guilt or because it's the right thing to do. I did tell him if he gets to a point where he is not happy being married to me, that I'd rather end it then live that way, but to at least have enough respect for me to tell me and not betray me. I would do the same for him.