carmaenforcer

I think many of us (men) have or, if not, will soon hear the
"love you but not in love with you". This usually means that your wife is looking somewhere else, having doubts, being shady already and trying to justify what she either has already done or is about to do, etc. I am also a survivor of infidelity and am trying to make things work.

It's a drama thing that mostly women do, but we can too. Head games, lies and the justifications are not exclusive to the female of our species. I hate games myself, but will drop down and play better than anyone when the situation calls for it.

The affect that telling someone something like, "love you but not in love with you" is like poison to ones self esteem.

You need to feel good about yourself before you start to and if you are too have any success in, rekindling the kind of feeling of love and respect from your spouse you once had.

Notice that I said respect, if you don't feel confident, sure of your self, your Wife will not be able to drop her guard and she will not respect you. If a woman does not respect you, she will keep you at arms length.

I think this is why ass holes do so well in maintaining long term relationships, even if it's a sick though, there is some truth to it.