Chris sorry that you are appalled by me, but such is life.
I said what I did to have Demoura think outside the box, we have a habit of our side is right only.
I may be blunt but I am truthful. No hidden agenda and trying to show both sides of the coin.
What have I gotten out of Demoura? She is a Strong confident women who is trying her best to keep her marriage in tact while taking care of her mother. She is fearful her husband is addicted to porn and has a S&M fetish, even though she has made some S&M videos with her husband, he chooses to watch other Porn with S&M. She is highly Educated and very passionate and tries to please her husband.
I used self absorbed before, because mose of us our with our own issues, I can safely say I am Self absorbed when it comes to my own needs, so is my wife, just how people are programmed, But I used that to have her try and spit out more info on her husband.
She is strong and she can take it. I mean she has a Harley and is a computer programmer, she will play S&M for her hubby, but is the submissive one.
I think he needs for you to be the Dominant one, especially with his little hissy fits. My wife is very submissive, we did a little Role playing with S&M and had her be the Dominant one, I ahve to say it was very thrilling for both of us for her to take control and just take what she wanted from me. Where as normally I am the one who initiates sexual desires. It was nice to ahve the shoe ont he other foot.
I can not say if your husband has depression, he just might, as we cross our mid life we have a hard time accepting our wild youth is over, I am still fighting it off.
I refuse to accept I am old at 38.
Has your hubby seen a Dr for Depression? I have thought about it a few times myself with some of my mood swings through life.
I know I can go out and say my wife is a slob, she is to passive, on the PC way to much playing computer games, she never cleans up, watches to much TV, But I also know marriage is a compromise and that we ahve to take the good with the bad. She is a wonderful mother, She is great in Bed, She is very loyal and very trustworthy, when she does cook, she cooks well, She has a great job with a great income, She does not nag me, She will have a drink with me and play cards and have fun with friends.
Bottom line you have to take the bad with the good, the question lies, where do you draw the line and what is a "deal breaker" for you?
A female co-worker just had a bad day, apparently she is a Achoholic, none of us knew, but she came in one day to work, 8Am, left early, she was Drunk as a skunk, got in 2 car accidents, fought a Police officer, was arrested for Aggrivated assualt, DUI, Open container, and leaving the scene of a accident.... She is a georgous woman that we all liked, married, 3 kids......If I were her husband....That would be a deal breaker for me, it would be over.
The question is what can you live with and what can you not? Also compare your marriage to others, is it really that bad? I know I have it pretty good, I'll take a sexy slob over a sexy drunk any day.