Originally Posted by morituri
You must understand something. For many of us an affair is a deal breaker that merits divorce. It doesn't makes us any better or any worse than the folks who are willing to R (reconcile) after their spouse has an affair. What is important is that you be absolutely certain which side you fall into. Like it or not, you will have to live with your decision and so you have to make sure that you will be at peace with it.
I always said it was my dealbreaker until it happened and then suddenly he was trying to talk me out of it and I was looking at the destruction of my family and my kid's pain and it wasn't that simple anymore.
If we had been married for a shorter time period and we didn't have kids, my choice would be easier.
It's the shared history, the good years and the love we still share.
But then there's the betrayal and the horrible way he treated me for so long and I feel that he does not deserve me.
I have no idea which side I fall on anymore. That's why i'm trying to sort it out because I have to live with this decision for the rest of my life.
Sadly, he didn't think of any of this before he made what he calls the most regrettable decision of his life. So disgusted with him.
If I wanted to end my M, I would allow my spouse some dignity and treat them with respect. I don't understand cheaters at all. Selfish, selfish people.