Originally Posted by bronwen
I have noticed also that the more I ignore him the more he has been dancing around trying to get my attention.
I am trying hard to get over the devastation his cheating has caused by not making him the centre of my life anymore. I don't ask him any questions about his EA because that always ended up in a huge row and made me feel worse (if that's possible).
I think my lack of interest is beginning to make him feel quite unimportant whereas as before when I would question him constantly and he would get angry, but I think in a peverse way he enjoyed the attention and the fact that he had two women who wanted him.
The last time we talked about it I just said "she can have you!" and he didn't like that at all.
I hope things work out for you.
It's all still a game though. Seriously, if we need to do a 180 to get them to want us, it's just a game to them.
I notice the same with my cheater husband. I told him he could have his OW, in fact I think they deserve each other, two cheaters.
Now that I have talked to an attorney and will be filing this week, he is ever more remorseful.
At first he showed no remorse and said too many hurtful things he could never take back.
We had one false R, but I am not willing to go through another.
He later said he said nasty things because he was angry. Still, I could forgive words said in anger if there was not OW in the scenario. Also, initially Why in heck was he angry. I did not have an affair, he did. So, he was angry I caught him and cut of his cake.
Anyway, he said that he can't stand the sight of the OW. He said it was like she was an enticing piece of cake, but after eating it he feels sick.
But then why the false R. Why did he contact her a week after DDay, why did he go to a men's club in the middle of what appeared to be a great recovery?