newwife123

We've been together three years, married one. Six months after dating my husband left his laptop signed on to his email. I snooped and discovered he belonged to three (that I know of) "meet people porn sites." I got on to one of them through his email and discovered he had been having very sexual conversations with three different women. He apologized, said he was just curious, and said he never planned on meeting any of them. We split up and slowly got back together. Since then I found out that he has an addiction to porn. He had several hundred movies downloaded. He apologized and said he would quit. Caught him again, ect. He agreed he had a problem and said he would quit and he would come to me if he felt the urge. Then I found evidencce of it again. He agreed to go to counseling and we went for about a month. It seemed to help. then I found out that he signed up for two different pay for porn sites. I saw it on his credit card statement. He denied it and said he used to belong to them and they just automatically renewed it. I called the sites and they do not automatically renew yearly subscriptions. You have to sign up new to them for the yearly plan. He signed up ten days after we were married. We do have sex and it's great, I'm the one who always initiates it and he does turn me down sometimes. I feelm so undesireable. I am not a prude at all, but I can't stand this! I constantly feel the need to check things and every time I do, I find something. He says how can we move on if I keep bringing up the past. I say I'm not bringing up the past, it's then present and what I've found recently. He says I need to quit looking. I say that every time I look I find something! Now he uses the inprivate browsing on his computer! I have no way of knowing what he looks at, but the fact that I saw him using that tells me he's hiding something! Last week I found a history on his phone of several videos he watched and he even had neked pictures saved to his photos on his phone. He said he would not go back to counseling because he doesn't have a problem. He says there's nothing wrong with a little porn. I said it's not a little porn, it's a ton! I don't want a divorce and I do love him, I just feel so sad that he lies all the time and he just keeps on doing it!